There is a plaque on the pavilion at Battersea Park commemorating the first ever game of association football, supposedly played there in 1864. Much has changed since. Back then, Queen Victoria was on the throne and America was fighting a civil war. The power station that now provides the backdrop to our Battersea games and affordable housing investment opportunities for billionaires would not be built for another sixty-five years. Overarm bowling had just been legalised, and WG Grace was embarking on his first-class career. Michael Rossi was a promising youngster.
When football comes home, then, it comes to Battersea Park. And for all the time that had passed since 1864, a well-timed downpour meant that at 1pm on the 4th July 2021 the pitch was still perhaps more suited to John Stones than to Olly Stone, to Raheem Sterling than to Rahkeem Cornwall. The rain cleared up, but Road spirits were quickly dampened when stand-in captain James Pinkney lost the toss and the Paddington Rabbits elected to put us in with the pitch at its wettest. (The Road had an additional reason to want to bowl first, as teas have returned and a spread that promised to slow you down in the field beckoned in the break between innings.)
Rabbits are burrowing creatures, well used to damp ground, and their bowlers certainly knew how to get the most out of the surface. Matt Small was the first victim, edging a ball that climbed off a full length towards his throat. Tom Birch joined the skipper in the trenches, and when he was LBW to one that kept low King’s Road were 2-2. Sham and Pinkney moved the score along nicely, until Sham fell to another low one and Pinkney to an outrageous catch in the covers. At 35-4 the Road’s top scrapper with the bat, Peter Jackson Eastwood, took charge, grafting away in the most difficult of conditions to push the score up towards three figures. As middle-order wickets tumbled (not without a few lovely strokes: Murray-Wood’s drive for four being the most glorious) PEJ dug in and earned every run. The Rabbits, though, were always a threat, and despite the comeback hopes raised by an early boundary from specialist number 11 Chris Brown the Road ended up bundled out for 118 in just 27.3 overs. Thanks to PEJ (23*) – who together with Extras (39) scored over half our runs – we had something to bowl at. A special note here, too, for our band of supporters (perhaps the biggest of the season so far) who kept our spirits up during what could have been a disheartening collapse.
Next came the most important part of the day: teas. With a year off to hone our culinary skills, big things were expected – and big things were delivered. The biggest things of all may have been Andrew Craigie’s chicken skewers which seemed a reasonable size for throwing into the enclosure of a particularly hungry lion, but also present were: two kinds of cake, three kinds of sandwich, two kinds of sausage rolls, and a daintier fruit-and-marshmallow based skewer courtesy of Fergus Jones. The centrepiece, though, was Niall Moorjiani’s chickpea curry, complete with homemade chapattis (though, rumour has it, they may have had help in the kitchen).
Bowling and fielding duties meant that we didn’t get too stuck into the teas between innings, but new skipper Pinkney certainly got stuck into his team talk. Intensity, focus, belief, energy and the need to keep it tight were hammered into our skulls as Browny fired up the engine. The results were almost immediate, with a very plausible shout for caught behind turned down from his first ball (a good grab from stand-in keeper Craigie, whose first stint behind the stumps in many years was impressive throughout). Not to worry, though, as later in the first over Fergus unleashed the trebuchet arm – following a strategic misfield, I’m sure – to run out the opener. Nikhil Venkatesh started from the other end and followed an unorthodox tactic of bowling leg-stump long-hops with a short on-side boundary: deservedly hit for a four and a six before a third attempt was top-edged onto the chest, and then into the hands, of that man again, Fergus Jones. Browny cleaned up the number three and at 17-3 the Road had made the early inroads Pinkney demanded.
Rabbits number four Fryer made a clear decision to anchor the innings and the fast and furious start gave way to a tense period, as Venkatesh found his line and length, Small and then Moorjiani came into the attack and maidens were played out carefully. Smally picked up one wicket – LBW – but deserved more, with astonishing figures of 7 overs, 3 maidens, 1-11. Meanwhile Fryer was well-set, and ruthlessly putting away the few bad balls that come down to him. At drinks, the game was finely poised: the Rabbits more than halfway there, and the pitch was drying out, but they were going slowly and we were giving them nothing in the field.
With so few runs on the board, we knew we needed more wickets, and especially that of Fryer. Niall provided, finding the glove and giving Craigie his first keeper’s catch for the Road. Then it was golden arm Shaminda de Silva into the attack, picking up two quick wickets (one a little lucky, dare I say, but the other a classic spinner’s dismissal) and the Rabbits had fallen from 73-4 to 75-7 with two new batsmen at the crease. Pinkney recalled Chris Brown to polish off the tail, but Rabbits have very short tails, as any biologist can tell you – and when number nine batsman Crouch drove Browny into the trees for six, whilst number eight swept Sham with beautiful smoothness, it was clear that this line-up had depth. Three tough chances went down, and heads began to drop, with every run edging the Rabbits towards the target and every minute drying the pitch out further. Venkatesh’s reversion to his leg-stump line didn’t help, and with three runs to defend and no bowlers to defend it with captain Pinkney did the honourable thing, bringing himself on and the field up, serving a juicy half-volley with his first ball and going down with his ship.
A strong fielding performance – with no wides or no-balls, and precious few byes – had not been enough. We were probably twenty runs and one bowler short, but we had the worst of the conditions and preserved some dignity. Finishing a little early gave us another chance at getting through the teas, helped down with a generous home-made ‘session wine’ provided by the Rabbits, great opponents who deserved their victory.
I’ll leave the final word to Captain Pinkney: “It was a ridiculously strong teas field. Everyone nailed it. I’ve never been more proud of a team.”
Awards:
Mandy of the match: PEJ for scoring all our runs
Embarrassing: Tom pouring curry down his shirt
Champagne: Fergus’s chest down Joe Cole catch
Tantrum: Niall and PEJ after the controversial ‘not out’ decision from Browny’s first ball
Savoury Teas: Niall’s curry with homemade chapattis.
Sweet Teas: PEJ’s King’s Road themed cupcakes
Overall: Niall’s curry
FULL SCORCARD: https://kingsroadcsc.play-cricket.com/website/results/4852767
Author: Nikhil Venkatesh