Tag: Matt Small
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T2Oscar’s Odysseys: Newlove of weekday cricket
After 5 years of arduous attempted repairs to my spacecraft, including several winters desperately sourcing key utensils in an attempt to paper over gaps in technology and materials, I was sad to admit that it was now unlikely to become flight worthy ever again. I’m also sorry to admit that any generous donors over winter…
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Paddington Rabbits mix up The Road’s well marma-laid plans
There is a plaque on the pavilion at Battersea Park commemorating the first ever game of association football, supposedly played there in 1864. Much has changed since. Back then, Queen Victoria was on the throne and America was fighting a civil war. The power station that now provides the backdrop to our Battersea games and…
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KRCSC vs Roehampton Bats: Welcome to the Scrap Yard
Firstly, I’d like to thank none of you rotten individuals for completing match reports in a timely manner. It’s noted and I consider it highly offensive. Take note of the 24-hour window this was delivered in. Moving on….a muggy day was greeted The Road as the Keith XI comprised of a couple of cricket players…
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King’s Road’s Metropolitan Liberal Elite out-Woked in Surrey
It was a fair Sunday by the time many members of The Road took the train from London to Woking. After many weeks of rain that would give the most Scottish members of the club nightmares, the great god Helios had finally decided to get in his chariot and ride merrily across the southeastern skies.…
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Oh, Mandy: Sodden Road squelch home in amp Brockley thriller
Some men are born great. Some have greatness thrust upon them. Others rock up to cricket every week and make the rest of us look ridiculous. So it was with housewives favourite Matt Andrews, Mandy (of the Match), against Brockley CC, a side against whom The Road have enjoyed several close games. In stormy…
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Tales of the Sea – Part 2 of 8: From the Depths of Hell
The final days of summer brought the largest audience for a cricket fixture in England this year (39 people and 7 dogs) with The Road facing off against the Paddington Rabbits in the wonderful surrounds of North London. Incompetent tossing once more led to The Road being sent into bat on a bouncy but true…
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![The Telling of Ferring – The Odyssey of Oscar [Poem]](https://krcsc.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2020/09/Ferring-Game-1.jpg)
The Telling of Ferring – The Odyssey of Oscar [Poem]
Ten King’s warriors kitted all in white, this week not playing the host, Rose early upon a Saturday morn, to make the long trip down to the coast.Their opponents this week a formidable bunch, going by the name of Ferring, The location a mystery to new club members, like the inner workings of a herring.…
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From the depths of despair – part 1 of 8 of “Tales from the Sea” (A Cairns Fudge Match Report)
After 8 long months at sea, I write this memoir from the depths of my cabin. Scurvy has long rendered me useless to this team and the most I can offer is the following collection of my thoughts. Under gloomy skies and high seas on the bank holiday weekend, The Road prepared to wage war…
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Small 5-fer doesn’t quite Hammer home victory over Abinger
“What time is the train?” – Never before have these five innocent words sent such ripples of chaos through a squad of 11 brave men. Never before have so many Saturday evenings been ruined by fear. Never before has train veteran Matt Small desperately succumbed to making up imaginary train routes simply to calm his…
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MATCH REPORT: Girl, Kew Really Got Me Goin’
“Cricket is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated” – Confucius c. 500 BC. I’m not entirely sure I’m with Confucius on that particular quote, as the smug bastard never had to cope with British summertime. So it was that a potentially thrilling conclusion to the match between King’s Road and Kew was…